Don’t Give Me a Line

Well, I’m back. Or am I?

I spent Thursday evening at the Thunderpub excited to be back and to catch up with all of the familiar faces around the room and yet unable to move. Perhaps it was culture shock, perhaps I was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of awesome in that room, perhaps as we have been learning in our Cross Cultural Communications class, the more I travel, the more I feel like a fish out of water in my home country. Either way, I’m back.

South Africa and social enterprise have been on my mind quite a bit here in this environment perfectly constructed for me to dwell on these ideas all day long. What keeps coming to mind is a mantra that was drilled into us as aspiring social entrepreneurs (forgive the lack of acknowledgement, but I’m sure someone wrote it in a book):

Think Big.

Fail Early.

Act Now.

I feel like I’ve followed these succinct guidelines to a “T” in my professional life these days (Think Big: Move across the country for a world renowned grad school named after a mythical creature then move across the globe to build social enterprises…check; Fail Early: I almost would rather this say “fail often”…check; Act Now: well, I guess I’m writing now, but most of the time I’m acting…check). However, my personal life might not have as impressive statistics on these directives.

A lot of current literature points to the need for boundaries. I’m learning how boundaries allow me to say “no” more easily and help prevent me from my over committing tendencies (don’t worry, my color coded calendars keep things straight).  Recently, in speaking with a number of close friends, they seem to draw boundaries around themselves that blur the purpose of the boundary itself. Does a boundary protect you from an external threat or prevent you from truly being a part of the life just across that invisible line. For example, the other night, were my boundaries at the pub helping me to adjust to life in the states, or were they keeping me from sharing the amazing experiences I’ve had. My friends’ boundaries were definitely holding them in. But they couldn’t see it. One friend allowed age to dictate his feeling unable to reach where he “should” be by now in his life. Another allowed her toxic workplace to make her feel like she didn’t have skills valuable to any workplace. Instead of using the boundaries to keep out the bad, somehow, they were keeping it in and not letting their amazing selves out.

Brilliant GOOD Magazine once again hit the nail on the head regarding the lines we draw in the article “Finding Tarzan at the Sanitation Department” by Nicola Twilley. A staff member at The Center for Land Use Interpretation (CLUI) in LA stated that, “The lines we draw around the edges of a place often provide the clearest view of the framework we are using to define it.” How is it that I can so clearly see the excellence and potential in my friends through these lines and because of them, when my friends can only see the lines themselves?

In our roles as catalysts in asset based community development, we were meant to act as a mirror to the communities. Allow them to better see what they already have right there. We need to start being better mirrors to one another in our personal lives, too. Let’s not drag down all the walls people have up. Some of them are important and do protect. But we need to see them for what they are and use them without letting them use us. Again CLUI notes that, “The landscape pulses with potential meaning. The heightened sense of awareness—the ability to notice the marks we leave on the Earth’s surface and listen to the stories they can tell us.” It is time to think about what marks are we leaving on one another, and what stories they can tell. And then we need to tell each other.

How else will we Think Big. Fail Early. and Act Now.?